First published by ACON 2024 in ‘The Loud Way Home‘1
Acorn-like, I split,
goose my neck for the light;
burst forth
feather out.
Or maybe it’s less boss bitch2 than that
and I start small,
slowly notice my foot, one toe; paint a nail?
Dye a few strands of hair;
meet my own eyes, just once;
remember to shower
or to eat.
However it happens, it starts.
Change — the only thing it’s safe to expect —
comes for us all.
My body’s right here —
as she was, all long.
If I relearn her contours,
the boundaries, what it feels like
to be safe,
will desire spring again
from that hidden well?
Can I reknit my body sock
in rainbow,
like maybe, deep inside
she always was?
Reading at Pride Poetry 2025:
- This anthology of works by queer survivors of sexual abuse was launched on 12 October 2024 at The Red Rattler in Marrickville, Sydney.
Cover image and fibre art/yarnbombing by Catherin J Pascal Dunk, 2024-2025. ↩︎ - Reference to ‘Boss Bitch’ by Doja Cat. Such a cool song! ↩︎
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Your poem gave me a giggle to start out the day. Thank you!
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You’re welcome! And thank YOU for reading it and saying so xo
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